Waffle. Batter. Smoothie.
My suggested recipe (single serving size):
~62.5 g flour (heat treated for 5 - 7 min at 350F, flour temp must be at least 160F)2 Tbsp sugar
1/4 tsp salt
1 cup whole milk**
1 cup plain full fat Greek yogurt
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
1 Tbsp unsalted butter, melted and cooled a bit
So I did.
I started with a solid waffle recipe from my favorite baking recipe website, Sugar Spun Run. The ingredients are as follows:
250 g flour
3 Tbsp sugar
2 Tbsp corn starch
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
3/4 tsp salt
2 cups buttermilk
2 large eggs
1 tsp vanilla extract
4 Tbsp unsalted butter, melted and cooled a bit
To make this safer to eat raw:
250 g flour (heat treated for 5 - 7 min at 350F, flour temp must be at least 160F)
3 Tbsp sugar2 Tbsp corn starch2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
3/4 tsp salt
2 cups buttermilk2 large eggs
1 tsp vanilla extract
4 Tbsp unsalted butter, melted and cooled a bit
There. The flour is placed on parchment paper on a shallow baking pan, then baked to a temp of 160F to kill off all bacteria, then pressed through a fine mesh to break up the clumps that form during baking. The corn starch is a thickener and therefore not wanted. The baking powder and soda help the waffle "fluff" during cooking, and I am not cooking, so they're out/unneeded. Raw eggs have to be removed, but the eggs are a combination structural support during baking (proteins/whites) and creamy flavor and texture (yolks). The former isn't helpful in raw batter, and the latter can be made up for with other ingredients.
If you want to not heat treat the flour and you want to incorporate the raw eggs, that's on you. We all ate some raw cookie dough when we were kids and turned out fine, but I'm not going to suggest it here. I'm going to tell you how to make it safer, and you should.
On to the trials!
I had a limited amount of flour to work with, so I divided everything into single-serving sizes so I could try a couple different permutations.
~62.5 g flour (heat treated for 5 - 7 min at 350F, flour temp must be at least 160F)
3/4 Tbsp sugar
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 cup buttermilk
1/4 tsp vanilla extract
1 Tbsp unsalted butter, melted and cooled a bit
Trial 1: Base recipe
3/4 Tbsp sugar
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 cup buttermilk
1/4 tsp vanilla extract
1 Tbsp unsalted butter, melted and cooled a bit
Following the instructions for the waffle batter recipe from Sugar Spun Run, just minus a few ingredients, this came together nicely in a medium size bowl. The batter was too thick, however, so I added another 1/2 cup buttermilk. Closer to drinkable, but you better really, really like the sour tang of buttermilk. I added another 3/4 Tbsp of sugar to compensate, and it tasted better, but still tangy and a bit thick. Buttermilk is better for baking, maybe not for a smoothie.
Final Trial 1 recipe:
~62.5 g flour (heat treated for 5 - 7 min at 350F, flour temp must be at least 160F)
1.5 Tbsp sugar
1/4 tsp salt
1 cup buttermilk
1/4 tsp vanilla extract
1 Tbsp unsalted butter, melted and cooled a bit
Verdict: A little too thick, and too tangy for my taste. If you love buttermilk, go for it!
Trial 2: Whole milk
~62.5 g flour (heat treated for 5 - 7 min at 350F, flour temp must be at least 160F)
1.5 Tbsp sugar
1/4 tsp salt
1 cup whole milk
1/4 tsp vanilla extract
1 Tbsp unsalted butter, melted and cooled a bit
Forget buttermilk, whole milk is sweeter, doesn't have the sour tang to it, and is a little thinner to boot. This batter ended up decent, it was about as sweet as the Trial 1 buttermilk batter but didn't have the sour tang flavor, and was indeed a little thinner.
Verdict: Not bad, but could be better.
Trial 3: True smoothie
1 Tbsp sugar
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 cup whole milk
1/2 cup heavy cream
1/2 cup vanilla nonfat Greek yogurt
1/4 tsp vanilla extract
1 Tbsp unsalted butter, melted and cooled a bit
Maple syrup to taste
Why heavy cream? I don't know, I had it on hand and was planning to try heavy cream plus Greek yogurt. It came out too thick, so I added another 1/2 cup of whole milk to thin it out. I only had vanilla nonfat Greek yogurt on hand, so perhaps full-fat plain Greek yogurt and a bit more sugar and vanilla extract would work better--creamier, and better control of the flavor. In the end, this was the tastiest and most smoothie-like. The maple syrup mixed in at the end made it taste a lot more like breakfast.
Verdict: Actually good!*
I didn't have enough remaining safe flour for another trial, but I'd recommend trying the following:
~62.5 g flour (heat treated for 5 - 7 min at 350F, flour temp must be at least 160F)
2 Tbsp sugar
1/4 tsp salt
1 cup whole milk**
1 cup plain full fat Greek yogurt
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
1 Tbsp unsalted butter, melted and cooled a bit
Maple syrup to taste
*Actually good! means that it tasted nice and I could drink it. There are some heavy caveats here, namely don't expect the fluffy inside, crispy outside, warm crunchy aromatic waffle experience. This is a smooth but chalky, moderately heavy, sweetened drink. It's not disgusting, if someone handed me one as a novelty I'd drink it, but there are a lot of better things to drink on this planet. And it requires as much work to make the smoothie as it does to make a waffle. I choose the waffle.
On the other hand, you could legitimately gross out your family, friends, or coworkers with a waffle batter smoothie, so that's a positive.
**If this batter is still too thick, add more milk, a splash at a time until its thinner. Don't worry about overmixing, all the ingredients where that would be an issue have been removed anyway.
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